All I Need is a Miracle

A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a
genie’s lamp. She picked it up and rubbed it. Lo-and-behold a
genie appeared. The amazed woman asked if she got three wishes

The Genie said, "Nope. Due to inflation, constant downsizing
low wages in third-world countries and fierce global
competition, I can only grant you one wish. So, what’ll it be

The woman didn’t hesitate. She said, "I want peace in the
Middle East. See this map? I want these countries to stop
fighting with each other

The Genie looked at the map and exclaimed, "Gadzooks, lady
These countries have been at war for thousands of years. I’m
good, but not THAT good! I don’t think it can be done. Make
another wish

The woman thought for a minute. She said, "Well, I’ve been
trying to find the right husband. You know, one that’s
considerate and fun, likes to cook and helps with the
housecleaning, has a great sense of humor and gets along with
my family, doesn’t watch sports all the time, rich, super
handsome, a great lover and is completely faithful and won’t
even think about another woman. That’s what I wish for. A good
mate

The Genie let out a long sigh and said
"Let me see that map again."